thoughts on anger and things i say to people

October 6, 2012 at 3:10 pm 2 comments

ok so its no secret i am angry a lot. i use words to hurt people. my mouth gets me in a lot of trouble. im not a nice person usually. i can be sometimes i guess, but usually i am not. but the truth is sometimes i might be mad, and i say things to people that i dont mean. it is just that im mad and i dont think i just vent and i speak my mind. i always speak my mind, thats one thing about me. i dont like being quiet, so i speak up and say what needs saying.

last night when i rang childline, i talked to tara. taras a really nice person. she is brilliant at her job. she always knows the right things to say. she never messes up. i told her that. she said she was only using my words and saying what i said in another way. i dont know about that.

but anyway we were talking. and i was mad. so i said, tara, you suck. and she said, ali, i know you dont mean that. and then she started asking me about other stuff, and she did not make a big deal out of the fact i had just said to her you suck. it shocked me. it really shocked me a lot.

people always make a big deal out of things i say. its always ali dont speak to me like that, or you cant, or im not going to listen if you say x or y, etc. the only other person who doesnt is our foster mom. usually if i said something horrible to her, she would say ali i know your mad, whats going on, why are you mad, tell me. and then usually after a while i would. it was just weird that tara didnt make a big deal out of what i said. and guess what i did? at the end of the call i said hey tara? and she was like yeah? and i said you dont really suck. she just laughed, and thanked me.



Entry filed under: Alters, Childline, Dissociation, Dissociative identity disorder, Foster mom, Inside kids. Tags: , , , , , , , , , .

Watching movies on my day off ali-i like this one quote

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