The food struggle

September 12, 2012 at 7:24 am Leave a comment

I really hate eating. I think food should be banned. It would be so much easier. Every day breakfast is a struggle. Trying to decide what to eat and how much to eat is a struggle. Fruit or toast or cerial, its a struggle. Nothing about eating is easy. I wish it was. I also wish I could skip the food. I cnt though. My foster mom says no. No way am I doing that. She says I gotta eat to maintain energy in school. I say I can drink and I’ll be ok. But no. She makes me eat. So I eat a banana and two slices of toast to keep her happy, not because I want to eat it. And now my day begins. The reason food is such a struggle is, well, I was denied it so much when I was younger, now the sight of it makes me want to vomit. If you put a plate of food in front of me, if it looks too big, I will not be able to eat any of it. None. I will freeze up and freak out. I am weird like that. I also have weird rules when it comes to food. Its all about control, I know that much, I have to be able to control what and when and how much I eat. At least I know that. I wish my bio parents didnt use food against me. It makes it so hard now.

Emily

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Entry filed under: Bio family, Bio mom, Biological family, Family, Foster child, Foster mom, Host, Host post. Tags: , , , , , , , , , .

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