bed is calling but we dont wanna go

August 4, 2012 at 11:14 pm Leave a comment

Is anyone afraid to go to bed?

night time was always the worst for us. baaaad things terrible things happened by night. we dont want to go to bed in case we have nightmares. see if we go to sleep we’ll probably get nightmares and wake up screaming. then the whole house will be awake because of us.

we are just soooo messed up it aint even funny. i hate it. why did our bio fam have to fuck us over so much? i hat them for it. I hate all of the adults in our bio family.

i mostly hate all adults. well except a small select few. i am learning to give my trust a little bit to our foster mom and to a few adults on childline that i talk too regularly.

its so hard. so very hard. trust is a scary thing. opening up is a scary thing. cause what if we get hurt again?

anyway this post is rambling now. i am just rambling about shit. sorry. i meant to talk about sleep and bedtime. its past midnight. i should take us to bed. i might make hot chocolate. and read or watch a dvd.



Entry filed under: Alters, Coping, Did, Dissociation, Dissociative identity disorder, Foster care, Foster child, Foster family, Foster parents, Inside kids, Insiders, Memories, Sleep, The past, Tough stuff, Triggers, Trust. Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , .

dont ask…please an open letter to those who deny DID exists

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